I think I have finally done it. As you can see it's not especially pretty, but how can I not love it having taken me so long? It is not a particularly smart design either, but rather one resulting from trial and error. A lot of trial and even more error.
This is how it started.
Attempt number one was this feeder suspended from the wire it came with on a shepherd's hook (bent rebar) that I had affixed to a fence post about six feet off the ground. Silly me. HDL (my shorthand for Huey, Dewey, and Louie the mischievous nephews of Donald Duck [note that I'm naming them now, this is a sign of something]) just simply jumped straight up onto the feeder from the fence. I learned later the longest recorded jump is 12 horizontal feet recorded by a similarly obsessed English observer.
The deer also got into the act and pawed them to pieces.
After gluing everything back together effort #2 was slinging them from wire I had strung between two large trees in our yard. Besides nearly beheading myself as I walked head-down behind my lawnmower this idea only stopped the squirrels. The deer still had their way with them and the few birds that did eat on them made a serious mess on my lawn.
More glue and nails.
Design #3 was an engineered approach. I bought some white PVC pipe in three different diameters so the pieces would sleeve into themselves allowing me to telescope the pole upwards to eight feet, above deer-pawing range. Clever, I thought. how could a retarded rodent possibly shinney up such a slick pole?
How I could have felt so confident I don't know. I had overlooked a tiny flaw in the design which was immediately apparent to the little cuties . . . the through-bolts that keep the sections from collapsing into eachother were handy grips for their little claws. I visualize this as their version of rodent rock climbing.
Creation #4 was crude but well-intended. A platform nailed to the base of the feeder (see photo) so they can't reach beyond the overhanging plate to raise themselves up. And no, no, don't use wood. They'd be able to grip that surface. I instead recycled a sign I had bought from a defunct real estate office made out of Corex which is like cardboard but made out of plastic. Yes, that's right, waterproof, claw-resistant, and stiff (I mention that because design #3-1/2 used a flexible plastic sign thinking as I did that it would bend and they would slide off. But it broke where the screws affixed it after too much bending).
But not wide enough. I didn't see them actually do it which would have been a treat in itself but they somehow reached clear around the plate from the already-slippery pole to defeat me yet again. I must confess that the feeling of being outwitted by a 12 ounce rodent was beginning to bother me at this point. Sally said I was beginning to mutter to myself and walk into and out of the shop with no apparent purpose.
Number 5 (pictured at top) is the last try. A bigger Corex platform. Thus far it is working but we haven't had a good blow yet, a factor I ignored entirely now that I write this.
I did in fact google this topic near the end of the design attempts and one of the advice articles said to build squirrel feeders to keep them from raiding the bird cafes. This is the age-old "if you can't beat 'em joing 'em" mantra.
And why not? I've got enough left over material.
PostscriptI give up. These rodents are driving in from the 'burbs to play with these feeders. With their tree-top telegraph system they're saying stuff like "Hey guys, check this out! This dude thinks he's smarter than WE are! Let's go rough up his ego a little."
Here are two shots of them doing that.
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